Comforting Presence
by Rilianne
Summary: {Slight KanoKido but mostly platonic; rushed drabble about anxiety; higher rating for an anxiety attack}


The music was just loud enough to be heard as Kano stood in front of the white door and prepared to knock. It was some odd American music with heavy instrumentals and vocals that shifted between singing and yelling; though the blonde wasn't extremely familiar with music, he could tell that the day's playlist was unusual for the gang leader's tastes but he wasn't in any position to question it. So, instead he knocked, calling out to her as he did and making sure he was loud enough to be heard. There was a momentary pause in the music and the silence that filled the air felt stifling.

"Hey, Kido," he attempted to start again, "can I come in?" Again, more silence followed and he began to wonder why she wasn't answering him, nearly giving voice to the concern when the music picked back up, much louder than before. It definitely wasn't unheard of for the girl to be mad at him but Kano genuinely couldn't figure out what he'd done this time. Reaching for the door knob, he shouted out an 'I'm coming in' but the jarring feeling of the door not opening caught him off guard. Even when she was mad at him, she didn't lock her door. No, she'd leave the door unlocked and see if the deceiver was stupid enough to try and come in. Scoffing slightly at his blunder and speaking again in a lighter, more amused tone, Kano tried again.

"Okay, okay, so what did I do this time, danchou?" Hearing the music turn down slightly, he continued, hoping to get a response this time around, "Is this about me not washing the towels? Is it the trash? Uhhh, I mean, I'll take it out right now, no need to be so cold to me." He ended the statement with a chuckle but after still no signs of life in the room save for the music, the uncomfortable feeling in his gut only worsened. One minute later and the music was back up to its initial volume. Two minutes and Kano knocked again with no response. Three minutes and as he'd turned very slightly to leave, the door swung open and before he was able to process what was happening, two shaking arms wrapped themselves around him and Kido buried her face in his neck.

"W-Whoa," he eloquently stuttered, mask not having been prepared, "I mean I know the stuff stinks but there's no reason to get so worked up about me taking out the garbage!" The blonde tried to keep his voice light and steady, unsure of himself and not wanting to scare her away. Behind her, the music she'd been listening to still played and he almost missed her raspy whisper in the midst of it. Though the feeling had been there already, Kano sighed, knowing now that something was wrong as he carefully wrapped his arms around her.

"Yeah, I know I'm an idiot…" The first tears soaked through his shirt at his words, and he found himself gently combing through her hair with his fingers, "What's wrong?" The green haired girl shook her head but it was weak and lacked the conviction of her normal movements; more tears landed on his shirt. Standing in the hallway felt isolated and quiet—even with the music—while she sobbed silently. Kano held her, saying nothing until a floorboard creaked from somewhere down the hall nearer the living area and he proposed they step back into her room. He led her carefully back into the small, dimly lit room and closed the door behind, letting her make her way to sit on the lilac colored bed. Following suit, Kano carefully set himself beside her, wrapping his arm around her again and pulling her closer. As her head came to rest on his shoulder, her sobs became vaguely audible and she turned to hide her face.

The silence was filled with the background noise her stereo provided but he could still clearly hear every time she took a ragged breath in or exhaled a choked sob. It was painful for him to see her in such a state of disarray but unable to properly comfort his childhood friend, he simply held her, letting her—and to an extent, himself—take relief in the presence of someone else.

It seemed like too short a time before her tears stopped and she was left hiccupping and her grip on him eased. The girl sat up slowly, rubbing at her eyes but looking very distant and not all quite there as she faced Kano.

Taking the risk he let himself ask her, "Are you okay?"

She nodded sluggishly.

"What do you need me to do?"

A finger pointed hesitantly at her dresser where a few different prescription medicine bottles lay. Kano stood and walked over to them, trying and failing to read the names on the labels; finally, he resorted to holding each bottle up to her as she shook her head yes or no. When he'd managed to get the one she was asking for, he handed over the small orange bottle and a water bottle that sat on her nightstand. She took the medicine with practiced ease before curling in upon herself where she sat.

"Hey, Kido," The boy returned to his seat beside her and rubbed small, calming circles on her back, "you're okay…" Comforting words had never been his strong suit but she looked up at him with a sort of melancholy etched in her face and she began to mouth the words 'I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry' to him. This reaction caught Kano off guard and he gently pushed her into a sitting position, moving himself so that they were in contact.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, is it the stuff with neesan that's bothering you again?" He recalled her developing issues with severe anxiety when Ayano died and being nearly immediately put on medication for it but he had forgotten with how little he'd seen the effects of that anxiety this past year. _How could I have been so stupid?_

"No," her reply was unexpected as her voice was still seemingly gone but she continued anyways, "It's just… it's just the anxiety, I'm fine." Yet even as she whispered those words, she kept herself pressed against him; she trembled slightly as her hand clutched at his parka. Kano sighed heavily, setting his forehead against hers and brushing some of the hair out of her face.

"It's okay to not be fine, Kido, because if you need me, I'll protect you, remember?" Her only reply came in the form of a small nod but he smiled genuinely at her, "Good, but you need to rest, don't worry about taking care of us, I'm sure Seto wouldn't mind making dinner for a change… and hey, you don't need to apologize for stuff like this, nothing's your fault." Before finishing his statement, Kano began pulling away, intending to give her space to lay down but her hand grabbed onto his shirt hem again and her eyes held defenseless sorrow that he hadn't seen in years, one that made him stop what he was doing. All for her. It'd always been all for her and it always would be.

"Please don't leave yet."

"I won't," his voice was softer now as he settled in beside her and the music track finished, creating a peaceful silence that signaled their pause from the chaos of the world—a signal that it was okay to breathe and relax now that the waves of anxiety were passed.

 _ **A/N:**_ ** _Hey so, I know I haven't posted much but I really needed to relax last night so I wrote this thing. I've been struggling recently with my anxiety and so I felt that if I could pour that into something productive, I would. So it's rushed and kinda garbage but I didn't hate it enough to not post it._**


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